I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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