if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
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