margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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