are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Randomize
