Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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