How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
