Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
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