How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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