i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
