just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
