Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
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