Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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