The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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