Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
