trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
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