oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
