Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
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