Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
