so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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