I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
