dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
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