you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
