Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
i love accidental penises.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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