you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
