honey bunches of taint.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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