Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Randomize
