Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
