You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
