Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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