oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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