the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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