i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
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