I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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