Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize