I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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