And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
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My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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