its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
my being single is dangerous.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
