Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Randomize
