I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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