Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Randomize
