Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize