I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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