She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
Randomize
