Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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