When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Randomize