Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Randomize
