Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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