he thought i was a dude.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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