Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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