normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
we're so committed to being not committed
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize