I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
